This week...

I go Tuesday for my ultra sound to check the mass in my uterus and will immediately see the doctor afterwards. Then Friday I have my colonoscopy.  I am terrified. I am alone in this. With the pandemic,  even if I had someone, no one could be with me. 

It makes me think of all those out there facing their own mortalities, with or without a support system, we are alone. It is isolating, it's scary and I don't know how some of you do it. Does this mean I won't face it? No. It just means, I feel alone, empty and scared and have no one here to.hold my hand while I face this. I do have some of the most amazing children in the universe who are rooting for me. They are the fuel that keeps me pushing forward. 

As I sit here and drink my coffee and get ready for group, I am trying to breathe and remind myself...I got this.